Baby AND a social life?

Does having a baby mean giving up your social life?

I recently read this post by the lovely Sarah which hit the nail on the head, and got me thinking. Every so often I go on Facebook or Twitter or wherever, and I see posts such as:

“Everyone I know is like: ‘Hey, I’m getting married/having a baby’ and I’m like: ‘I’m planning my travels around the world”

…Or something similar, and it always wound me up a little – I’m sure it’s never meant in an offensive way, but sometimes it reads as though you can only do one or the other, or that having a baby or getting married is inferior or ordinary because hey, everyone is doing it.

Sam and I have been on some absolutely amazing trips. We’ve been to Vietnam, Thailand, Sri Lanka, New York, Singapore, Budapest… We would sleep in hostels, travel on sleeper trains, sit on plastic stools drinking cheap alcohol in the middle of the road, jump on motorbikes and go whizzing round Thai islands. It was incredible, and so much fun. Now we have a baby. We can’t do all those things right now, but that isn’t purely because we have a baby, and who is to say we couldn’t do them in the future with Dougie? Just because we have a baby doesn’t mean we have to spend the rest of our lives sat on the sofa quietly watching Netflix. I mean, we do that a lot – but we did that a lot even before Dougie was around – and a lot of my friends do that even if they don’t have a baby!

Kuala Lumpur

Having a baby doesn’t mean giving up on things YOU want to do. Yes, we have to adapt, and yes things are different now, but we just came back from our first family holiday, and while there was less travelling, and we definitely had a lot more luggage with us, it was an amazing trip, and I’m so excited to do more family trips. Once Dougie is a bit bigger, we could do more of the adventurous trips, there’s no reason why we shouldn’t!

If anything, I’ve found that I’m probably more sociable now I have a baby. This weekend, I spent the afternoon in the pub with a few of my friends, enjoying a drink and catching up. Not much different to how it used to be, except we all had our babies with us! They sat on our laps or in their pushchairs, they chewed on their toys and dribbled down their tops (completely adorable) and it was such a lovely afternoon. I’d never have met this group of friends if it hadn’t been for the fact we were all due to have babies around the same time. Sometimes we’ll go to baby cinema, other times for food, or to each others houses, and yes we talk about our babies because it’s so nice having other people who understand exactly how exhausted you are, or who are happy to see 573919 photos of your baby eating sweet potato, but we also talk about other things too.

Dougie & I in Bath

Dougie has been on holiday to Portugal with us, spent New Years Eve in Bath with some friends, been on a weekend away in Edinburgh, come to the pub with us for birthday celebrations and he comes for brunch with my friends. At the moment while I’m still breastfeeding, I do tend to be at home in the evenings, but my friends are happy to come round in the evening, and seem perfectly content to stay in and watch a film or whatever with me once Dougie is in bed!

Dougie’s first time at the beach – sand was a success!

The point of this post is simple – if you choose to start a family, you do what is right for you. If you want to be a stay-at-home parent, good for you. If you want to travel with you baby, go for it! Your social life will change, but it doesn’t have to disappear!

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  • Steph – Wanderlust Pulse

    I live in Cyprus and still spend a lot of time watching Netflix, nothing to do with a baby haha!
    I read this amazing article once about a nurse who used her maternity to go off travelling with her husband and newborn. Anything you wanna do, you can do it! Sure, it’s not always easy and there will always be obstacles but that applies to absolutely anything in life.
    Regardless of a baby, if you want a social life, you will have a social life.
    I’d always be happy to come round and watch a movie with you x
    * Disclaimer: Parent of zero children and one adult boyfriend.

    • Haha, I love the disclaimer! I read that article too! We genuinely debated doing it, but it was financial reasons rather than baby reasons that prevented it! Yessss movie night please!

  • Chelsea Hodges

    Great post, I think there’s such a HUGE misconception that when you have kids, all fun goes out the window. It’s so possible to still do both! That’s great to see that you still manage to travel and have fun!

  • This is such a great post! And it makes me feel so good! Not so scared of having a baby now. Not that I am planning on having one soon but my social life does matter to me. xx corinne

  • Lolita “Lolitambonita” Bonita

    Love this post. My mum took us to live in Africa for a year when I was 8 so I feel you girl. Nothing has to stop just because you have kids. In fact you can give them some incredible experiences! x
    Lola Mia //

  • Lauren paigey

    Amazing post and loving the dinosaur onesie! x

  • Morgan Miller

    As someone no way near having a baby haha I find this so interesting! There are so many misconceptions I’ve heard about having a baby in the future ect. and so this was a really good read x

    Morgan //

  • Jodie.Mitch

    Ooooh that dinosaur onesie is the cutest thing ever. It’s so great you’ve all just carried on as usual in a way, just with some extra cute additions!

  • Della Driscoll

    I loved this post!! So true, Dougie is too cute xx

  • Keighley Smith

    I love this post! People seem to think that your life is over when you have a baby especially because I am only 18 and it’s really isn’t that different (saying this with one little one!). Dougie has been on so many lovely adventures already! We are hoping to pack up our lives and our baby and go on travels next years, I firmly believe that babies don’t stop you from doing or achieving anything! – Keighley (makeupandmummydays) xx

  • Ellis Woolley

    You guys are absolutely adorable! Little Dougie is the cutest and I couldn’t agree more with what you’ve said. You can definitely do both and I totally understand the whole ‘eugh people are getting married or having babies…’ because I get that a lot too due to getting married at 24. More posts like this – loved it! 🙂 Ellis x //

  • Sarah Pears

    How have I only just found this post?! I’m so sorry it’s taken me so long! I’m so glad I’m not the only one who thinks this.. I was worried it was just me! You’ve done some amazing things and I can’t wait to see what else you get up to with Dougie!

    Sarah xxx

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